' They Call Me June: My Angels . . . I will remember you forever this way
Wednesday, March 4, 2009

My Angels . . . I will remember you forever this way

I just found out that a dear friend of mine's daughter has cancer, and it has spread too much to operate. My heart breaks at this news for my friend, for her daughter, for her daughter's son. I don't know why this has happened. And through my sadness, I go about my nightly routine, putting my little ones to bed. Brush teeth, potty, read two books (one for Karsten and one for Ella), then the next part is a little different for each munchkin. Karsten likes to be covered up by his "magic" quilt (which his great grandma made for him) first, then his doggie duvet cover on top of the quilt. He likes two stuffed animal dinosaurs laying on the pillow next to him and his turtle night light (which displays TONS of stars and moons all over his room in different colors, Karsten prefers blue) at the end of his bed by his toes. Ella snuggles into her white and green dotted duvet cover and demands her "dee dee" (an old and tattered pink silky blanket) which she will sniff and smell while she sucks her thumb. (I know, I know, I need to break her of that habit!) She has a huge Hello Kitty stuffed animal next to her and her ladybug night light by her head (she prefers the stars and moons in the color red). For both of my loves, a kiss and hug good night, "Sweet Dreams" to both and a silent prayer that they will have a peaceful slumber. I know how incredibly lucky I am to have these moments with them - before the decisions they make have so much impact on their lives, each decision is crucial. But I have to constantly remind myself of this, because I am so tired right now, I could scream. And I am so stressed with work and money, my brain and spirit hurt. Then I hear of my dear friend and her terrible news, and I am reminded of how amazing my life is - even for a moment as I tuck my two angels into their safe beds for another night.

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